


The Subtle Art of Revenge

by LadyKenz347



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 8th year, F/M, Hogwarts, Kinda crack-y, No sex though, Payback, Sexual Content, Utter ridiculousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:46:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26072881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyKenz347/pseuds/LadyKenz347
Summary: Hermione Granger masters the subtle art of revenge.Or the one where Theo gets tied up and left naked.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Theodore Nott
Comments: 24
Kudos: 205
Collections: Welcome Back to Hogwarts Fest





	The Subtle Art of Revenge

_ Sunday Morning after Easter Break, 1999 _

“I didn’t go back to the Manor, are you fucking crazy?” 

Theo could hear Malfoy and Zabini’s voices echoing down the hall and he grimaced, squirming in his bed. 

“You should’ve come to Italy with me,” Blaise said. “I chased everything in a skirt and got pissed every night.”

“Hah. I’m sure you’re exaggerating there—” 

The door creaked open and Theo blinked at his friends, shifting a little higher on the bed as he grimaced at the tightness of the restraints on his wrists. 

“Hello, mates,” he said with a tight smile. 

Malfoy’s gaze flickered around the room, his cheeks turning a slight pink while Zabini couldn’t even look at Theo, instead letting out a low whistle. 

“Nott,” the blond drawled. “Have we… uh, have we interrupted?”

Swallowing the volatile mix of dread and relief, he prayed that the damn stuffed Lion on his prick remained firmly in place. “Quite the opposite. I seem to find myself in a bit of a bind and require assistance.” 

His cheeks flushed as an amused smirk twisted on Malfoy’s lips. Blaise still refused to look, making straight for his bed and lying flat on his back. “I didn’t take you for a kinky fuck, Nott. This is quite the surprise. Tell me how  _ exactly _ you got yourself strewn up, butt naked with a lion covering your prick.”

Theo’s lips curled and he fought his restraints for the hundredth time. “One word.  _ Granger _ .” 

_ Fourteen Hours Prior _

The amount of students who had remained for Easter break was honestly a little embarrassing. There were so few of them and yet they still awkwardly stayed to their house tables though there were sometimes only two of them seated. The resounding silence in the Great Hall was deafening at best.

Theo stayed out of necessity. There was no way he was going home and unlike his dormmates he didn’t have galleons upon galleons to spend on a luxurious continental trip. His  _ father _ had the galleons and he hoarded them like a stingy dragon. 

For the first week, he travelled around the castle and to Hogsmeade, caught up on his homework until the end of term and mostly kept to himself. 

It wasn’t until Hermione Granger had given him a strange sort of lingering look one day when they were on the grounds that he had thought maybe he could have a bit of fun this holiday. 

She was fit, after all. More fit than he remembered, to be sure. The delicate curve of her bum and the way her lips quirked just so… Yes, she had grown into herself since the last time he’d noticed. And when he found her down by the lake and sat next to her, she didn’t curse, hex, or jinx him. 

She’d  _ talked _ to him. 

For the next week, he chased Hermione Granger like he was a tomcat. Following her around the castle as she checked on the comings and goings of the younger students still on campus, searching for shooting stars up in the Astronomy Tower, or sneaking her into Slytherin Commonroom so she could see the Giant Squid up close and personal.

The more time he spent with the witch, the more he realized she wasn’t just messy hair and too many facts. She was almost… funny. Sort of. Not in a classical sort of way but she made him laugh and the way her cheeks would pinken if he looked at her too long made his stomach do something stupid. 

The Saturday before the students were meant to return, they strolled through Hogsmeade side by side. He watched for an hour as she perused the stacks of the bookshop she’d probably already memorized top to bottom, and then they bought a box of truffles and made their way to the bridge, sitting with their feet dangling over the stone bridge. 

“Do you know what you’ll do?” she asked, brushing her thumb along the corner of her mouth where a bit of chocolate still lingered. 

“Do?”

“After Hogwarts… it’s not far off now. Will you move home?”

A shiver inched over his skin and he violently shook his head. “No. No chance of that.To be honest I’m not really sure what I’ll do. Some of us talked about getting a place in London but after that, I am at the star’s command.”

Hermione snickered and rolled her eyes. “Merlin, don’t do that. Don’t trust something as inconsistent as the stars. They move every night.” She took another bite of a pink truffle and white chocolate clung adorably to her lips. 

“What should I trust, then?”

“Your intuition, your brain.” She looked down at the half eaten chocolate still in her fingers. “Your heart. I’m sure they will lead you down the right path, wherever it is you end up.” 

So slowly that he felt like he might burst, her gaze fluttered up to his, eyes then landing on his lips. 

It wasn’t that he hadn’t kissed girls before because  _ of course _ he had. It’s just that he didn’t go around kissing girls like Hermione Granger. Those kinds of girls were  _ the _ girls. You didn’t fuck around with them; you married them. 

Kissing her would change his life. Forever. 

Heart hammering against his ribs, he leaned forward and touched her chin gently, his thumb grazing the curve of her bottom lip and brushing the chocolate from her skin. “You’ve got a little something…” 

That beautiful blush returned and Hermione sucked in a shaky breath as he leaned forward and gently pillowed his lips over hers. As soon as their mouths met, she lurched forward, scooting closer to him on the bridge and curling her arms around his neck. 

Like the proper gentleman he was, he didn’t press for more. Didn’t let his fingers linger or beg to take her under the closest tree.    
  


It was _ she _ who parted her lips and invited him in. Strawberry and chocolate still lingered on her tongue and when she let one palm fall to his thigh, he broke away with a hard inhale. 

She bit into her beestung lip, cheeks pink from the crisp air or a fresh snog, he wasn’t sure. “Come on, then.” Swinging her hips back over the other side of the bridge, she began retreating backward towards the castle, her eyes locked on his. “My common room still has people in it. Let’s go to yours.” 

Theo followed behind her awestruck, mentally plotting a careful course ahead for the night. He’d allow himself to grab her arse and  _ maybe _ a tit, but he wouldn’t drift anywhere else. She’d probably fucking flay him if he tried. 

_ But what if she touched him? _

Wincing, Theo adjusted the new tent in his trousers as they rushed down the stairs to the dungeon, and Hermione stopped just outside the entrance. He gave her one final look and found her almost bouncing on her toes with anticipation. 

The witch really wanted to snog it seemed. Two young wizards sat on the sofa near the wall of glass, their mouths locked and completely oblivious to the onlookers. 

Theo grimaced. Of all the rotten luck. “If you want, we could go to my—” 

But Granger was already skipping down the hall towards his room. He wasn’t sure what on earth he’d done so bloody right but within moments he was going to be snogging Hermione Granger on his bed and no one else in all of Slytherin could claim such a thing. 

The closer it got the more nervous he became. His hands started to tremble and his breathing turned labored. Fuck all, when she sat on the edge of the bed and scooted back against the pillows. 

“Granger, we don’t have to if you don’t—” 

With a signature eye roll she climbed to her knees and back to the edge of the bed, her hands settling on his hips as she stared through thick lashes up at him. “I want you, Theo. All of you.” 

He swallowed a groan as she lightly tossed him onto the mattress and straddled his lap. Embarrassment raced through his system when she undoubtedly felt his hard cock against her jeans but then she fucking rolled her hips and for a splinter of a moment, his vision went black. 

When it returned, his hands were possessed. They were certainly not following the careful guidelines he’d set forth on the walk here as they were not just touching a tit but full out groping the pair of them. He grabbed her by the hips and rocked her hard against his lap and when she moaned into his mouth he swore he almost fucking died. 

And then, because the universe was so bloody good, she lifted up and tore her shirt over her head, wild curls spilling over her shoulders as she reached for the hem of his shirt. 

Her small hands travelled up the length of his torso, feeling the shallow valleys of his lean muscle with a gentle touch. She kissed her way from his belly button to his sternum, pushing his shirt higher and higher until it, too, was flung somewhere over the room. 

“Holy shit,” he choked out, as she reached behind her and unclasped her bra, breasts spilling into his unhindered view. “Fuck, you’re not at all what I thought you’d be like, Granger.” 

She smirked and threaded her fingers in his hair, tugging gently and pulling his head back. “Oh, you have no idea, Nott.  _ Incarcerous.”  _

His arms shot over his head as thin rope wound around his wrists and then secured to the bedposts. Hissing, he shot her a nervous look. “Did you just do that wandlessly? Also why did you just—” 

She waved him off with a dismissive hand. “I practice sometimes.”

Rising to her knees, her hands worked on the button of his jeans and sliipped his fly open. “Merlin, Granger. Is this a little fast? We don’t have to—  _ Ahh, fuck.”  _ He choked when her hand slid under the elastic of his pants and gripped him. 

For a moment, her lips fell open, and her eyes widened in surprise, but then she was grinning, hand leaving his cock. She fell over him, breasts pressed against his chest and Merlin, all he wanted to do was bloody touch the witch but the damn restraints were not allowing for such things. 

“You should wandlessly cast my hands free. I promise I’ll make it worth your while.” He moaned as she laved a wet kiss over his neck, trailing to his shoulder, then to his chest. Slowly , she slid down his body and began tugging his jeans and pants off. “Granger?!”

“Shhh, you’ll like this part.” 

His body went slack as he stared up at the top of his covered bed, trying to figure out how in the world he’d gone from kissing her over a box of truffles to being fully naked within twenty minutes. These types of situations were best left to more cunning Slytherins, like Malfoy and Zabini. Theo was out of his element. 

And when her lips closed around the head of his prick, his entire body tensed and he let out a silent cry, trying not to thrust down her throat like a neanderthal. 

“Oh, fucking hell.” He bit into his lip, trying to think of anything that might help him not spill in her mouth right the fuck now. Her hand and mouth worked beautifully together, rising and falling in perfect tandem and when she swallowed enough of him for the tip of his cock to brush the back of her throat, he violently fought the binds that tied him. 

He wanted to bury his hands in her curls and keep her on his cock for the rest of his life. He finally found the strength to look down as she dragged a flat tongue up the length of his prick, her gaze locked on his. 

“I’m going to come, Granger. Fuck, please, let me loose.” 

“Not a chance,” she said with a grin, her hand pumping him faster as she came up over him, her breasts dangling over his chest. 

He started thrusting into her fist, eyes fluttering shut as the familiar tension built in his belly and then shot free over his belly. His mouth fell open and he fought for breath until his body eventually went slack and boneless into the mattress. 

“Holy shit, Granger. You’re-- “ He gulped. “Let me loose so I can repay the favor.” 

The mattress dipped and his eyes shot open in time to see her grab her shirt and shrug it over her bare breasts. 

“Where are you going? Granger!” 

“I’m so sorry, Theo…” 

He kicked his way to a seated position, testing the hold on his wrists once more. “What do you mean sorry?” 

Hermione seemed entirely unphased by the sudden shift in personality as she  _ aha’d _ and picked up her bra. “Don’t be mad, Theo, but this is payback.” 

“You sucked me off as payback? Payback for what?!”

“Of course I didn’t go down on you as the payback, that was more an apology and a hope that you’ll understand I had absolutely zero choice in doing this. I still really like you and would love to hopefully see where this goes in the future.” She took a few steps forward, a genuinely kind smile on her lips. “I really mean that.” 

Snorting he wiggled around on the bed to try and free himself. “Undo these.” 

“I can’t.” 

“You’re going to leave me on this bed, naked and covered in my own semen?” he said with no trace of amusement in his voice. 

“Oh, Merlin. I’d never.  _ Scourgify.”  _

Theo exhaled sharply, disbelief contorting his features. “That’s  _ obviously _ not the part I took objection with Granger!” 

“Now, don’t get angry. I still want us to be friends after this but like I said I have no choice.” 

“I’ve never done a single thing to you!”

“That’s not  _ entirely _ true.” She bared her teeth in a look of fake contrition. “In fourth year you stung me with a jellylegs curse and I fell in front of all of the Astronomy class.” 

Theo blinked at her. Then again. “Are you fucking mad? Let me go!” The springs of the mattress creaked under his violent attempts to free himself. 

“I know this seems extreme, but I swore that day I would get you back. Ginny swore I wouldn’t and even though she’s younger than I am, she’s always far more—” 

_ “Get on it with, Granger!” _

“She got to pick and I solemnly swore I’d do it! But then Voldemort and the war and I honestly just forgot! But she remembered and I swore I’d do it; I couldn’t go back on my word.” 

Theo’s jaw hung open as he gaped at the slightly abashed witch. “You can’t go back on your word so you are going to leave me tied up with my cock out?”

She stomped her little foot and huffed. “You don’t understand, I’d never hear the end of it.” 

“Godsdamnit,  _ I’ll never hear the end of this!”  _ He kicked his feet wildly into the mattress, flopping around on his own bed like a fish out of water. 

“I really am sorry, Theo and maybe we can go to Hogsmeade next weekend? Here—” She swirled her wand through the air and a medium sized plush lion materialized. “I’m supposed to leave this with you…” 

She crept forward and placed it gingerly over his crotch. His eyes went wide at the soft little thing and he turned back to gawk at her. “You’re joking.” 

She grimaced. “I wish I were… I’ll see you soon, yeah?” She pressed her palm against Theo’s chest and kissed him on the cheek. “Sleep well.” 

And then she just… left. 

  
  


_ Sunday Morning After Easter Break _

“Stop. Laughing.” Theo’s eyes narrowed at his dormmates who were lying on their sides bursting with laughter. “Cut me loose. Grab my wand. Something, you fucking wankers!”

Malfoy sobered, his eyelashes wet from laughing too hard. “Now, now, Theodore. Is that the way you want to talk to the one person who might be able to free you? Ask nicely.” 

Behind him Zabini was still rocking with loud laughs. 

“Draco, please release me from these fucking binds before I burn this room down in a fit of accidental magic.” 

“You’re never any fun, Nott.” Malfoy flourished his wand through the air and his hands fell in useless humps against the mattress. 

Growling under his breath, he scooted to the edge of the bed and snatched his trousers up. As he jumped to his feet and hopped them on he reeled couldn’t stop cursing under his breath. 

“Tell us,” Malfoy said as he fell against his mattress. “What will you do now? Do you actually like Granger?”

His shoulders sagged. “Yes, unfortunately I do.” Slowly, he turned, a smirk pulling on his lips. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t get even.” 

xXx

**A/N: Well, this kind of fic is a bit of a first for me but I hope you enjoyed it! It’s a bit of crack but I had fun writing it! Big thanks to BookLoversDream for the last minute beta. Any remaining errors are mine and mine alone. Thanks to TriDogMom for the prompt.**

**Hope you all have a lovely day and thanks for reading :)**

  
  



End file.
